A Nice Little Random Chat
by Mint Cherise
Summary: Hermione, Harry, and Ron sit together in a random library, having some sort of secret meeting thing. Hermione’s forgotten to take her Prozac, Harry always gloomy, and Ron is drunk. A Super Random Drabble...


_**Beore you read, know that this contains info from the last Harry Potter book. DONT READ if you HAVEN'T FINISHED THE HARRY POTTER SERIES. Otherwise you'll want to throw rocks at me or something, because this has serious spoliers. You've been warned. **_

_(Hermione, Harry, and Ron sit together in a random library, having some sort of secret meeting thing. Hermione's forgotten to take her Prozac, Harry always gloomy, and Ron is drunk. Of course, they've all had a little to drink, therefore are a bit tipsy. Ron and Harry sit together, a little far apart, on a couch, and Hermione in an arm chair…alone.)_

Hermione: So, Harry. Am I the only one pissed at the fact that I didn't wind up with you?

Harry: No, there was totally allot of fan base on our pairing.

Ron: Pa-lease, there was no fan base for that pairing whatsoever.

Hermione: Shut up Ron! I can't believe I married you!  
Ron: You shut up! I can't believe Ginny married Harry!

Harry: I'm just as surprised, I mean what the heck?!?

_-Ginny enters skipping and sits down on Harry's lap. Harry looks entirely uncomfortable--_

Ginny: Harry, I love you so much! Your so deep and darn mysterious, and like famous.

Harry: I wish I wasn't famous, so then my parents would be alive.

Ginny: But then you wouldn't have that killer scar.

Harry: Oh, you have a good point.

Ron: It's a pretty nice scar.

Hermione: I always thought it looked sexy.

Ginny: Be quite Hermione, he's mine.

Harry: About that Ginny.

Ginny: (Wide Eyed) Yes Harry?  
Harry: Remember when we talked together about those pictures of Draco and me, doing certain things…

Ginny: Of course Harry! You said that they were photo shopped by stupid fangirl Hermione!

Hermione: What the bloody hell Harry?

Harry:-ignores Hermione, like everyone else- Well, I lied. Those photo's belonged to…Ron.

Ron: WTF???

Harry: Okay, that's a lie too. They belong to me Ginny, and they're real.

_(Ginny jumps off of Harry, and raises her hands to her mouth in horror. Tears rim her eyes.)_

Ginny: So that means your…

Hermione: Cheating?

Ron: Naked on the internet?

Ginny: Gay! Noooo! (She starts to run off sobbing, but trips on her own feet and falls. She looks back at the others, stands up, and then runs off.)

Harry: Damn, I didn't even get to tell her how my heart has been rotting inside of my hollow chest, and how it feels like I've been pushed into an ocean of sorrow and darkness…

Hermione: Save that for your wizard blog Harry. Or Malfoy, he'll just slap you quiet.

Ron: (Looking towards Harry in awe.) Dude, you're so deep.

Harry: Deep like the scars on my wrist.

Ron: Harry, I think I love you.

Hermione: Hell, what about the damn girl! All of the boys are ugly, evil, or gay! It's no fair!

_(Both Ron and Harry ignore Hermione as the scoot closer together on the couch they are sitting on.)_

Harry: Ron, I know you've had feelings for me for a long time.

Ron: Harry-

Harry: No Ron, don't say a thing I know. It hurts.

Ron: You know me too well. _(They scoot closer, closing the distance between their friendship. With thighs bumping against each other, Harry puts his hands on Ron's cheeks)_

Hermione: I think I'm going to have a nosebleed…

_(Draco storms in, looking pissy and, to put it bluntly, fucking jealous.)_

Draco: You angsty little man whore!

Harry: Draco! _(Pulls away from Ron)_

Ron: Malfoy! _(Pulls away from Harry)_

Hermione: Fuck.

Draco: I leave you alone for one night, and find you trying to shag your best friend! What the hell Harry!?

Harry: This hurts me so…_ (Is cut off by Malfoy, who slaps him. Harry rubs his cheek, but totally likes the pain)_

Draco: Be quiet, did I say you could talk?! And you! _(Turns to Ron.)_ The fan girls say to stay away from Harry, got it?!

Ron: To hell with the fan girls! I'm going to love Harry no matter…

_(Angry fan girls rush in the library, carrying torches.)_

Fan Girls: Ron, this is strictly a DracoxHarry fic. Pure gay, sexual tension between enemies! That is love! Friendships that are transformed into so much more _(a.k.a. friendship sex oneshots) _are next week! Get with the program!  
Ron: But…

_(The Fan Girls chase Ron out of the library.)_

Draco: Now that that's settled, come Harry! We shall go have gay sex on a random library table!

Harry: Oh, but Draco. They'll see….

Draco: Let them watch!! _(Pulls Harry off the couch. Harry pretends to put up resistance, but so wants to have sex in a library. The two walk down the bookshelf isles_,_ leaving_ _Hermione depressed and lonely._)

Hermione: Damn Fan Girls. Maybe I'll just be a fucking lesbian.

-The End-


End file.
